


When We Gonna Stop with It

by iktwabrokenbone (apiculteur)



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Oblivious, Перевод на русский | Translation in Russian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-07-26
Packaged: 2018-02-10 13:44:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2027277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apiculteur/pseuds/iktwabrokenbone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler and Josh pretend to be dating to piss Mark off. (Seriously, guys, that's the only reason.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	When We Gonna Stop with It

**Author's Note:**

> hey thanks to solochaos for giving me ideas.
> 
> title from holding onto you by twenty one pilots
> 
> edit: theres a translation in [ру́сский](https://ficbook.net/readfic/5015505)!!! tysm :"))

Being on the road for a long time got really boring. It was hours in a cramped space with several other grown men, and a whole lot of junk food and Mario Kart. So they ended up coming up with their own ways to entertain themselves, much to the dismay of their bus driver, and most likely the general public.

Currently, the two main ways of killing time were truth or dare (no one ever chose truth, so it was really just dare), and various increasingly frequent pranks. In the last week, Josh had been dared to buy three items that would worry the cashier most (a My Little Pony DVD, lube, and tissues), Tyler had tried to catch a duck, and Mark had tried to cry on a stranger's shoulder about his lack of Cheetos.

As his most recent prank, Mark had soaked their toothbrushes in /something/ sour, and laughed his ass off when they ended up immediately trying to rinse the sour taste out of their mouths.

Obviously, this meant they had to fight back. So they waited until Mark had left the bus before brainstorming as many things as possible that they could do to piss him off. None of their ideas were that great, and they were running out of ideas, so Tyler said, "Fake dating."

Josh looked confused. "Why would we do that as a prank?" he asked.

Tyler blushed and shrugged. "It would piss Mark off if we were all cute together in front of him, or making out or whatever."

"You want us to make out?" He was speaking slowly, looking right at Tyler as though to try to force him to realise what he was saying.

"No! Yes. I mean- just in front of Mark." This was going well. He wished he hadn't brought it up. "We can think of something different."

Josh's eyes went wide, and he shook his head, looking slightly distressed. "No! Let's make out. In front of Mark. It's a good idea," he said, and Tyler smiled.

They could hear Mark trying to get into the van, so Tyler grabbed hold of Josh's hand, and leaned his head against his shoulder. When Mark got in, he didn't even look twice at them, which made sense, really, since they acted like this most of the time anyway. They were going to have to up their game.

"We should kiss," Tyler whispered directly into Josh's ear, because the bus was small and Mark was only a couple of meters away.

Josh nodded. "Climb on top of me."

It would be too risky to whisper-argue about who should be on top of who, so Tyler huffed quietly as he awkwardly straddled his lap, accidentally sitting down too hard on his crotch. Josh bit his lip to avoid crying out in pain, and Tyler apologised quietly as he shuffled away from his crotch.

Josh just shook his head to reassure him that he was fine, then placed a hand at the back of Tyler's neck to pull him closer. It was probably ten seconds of slightly uncomfortable (and kinda pleasant, though Tyler wouldn't admit that) making out later that Mark turned around.

"Oh, gross, what- _seriously_ ," Mark complained, coughing loudly when they didn't stop kissing. "You didn't tell me you guys were dating."

Tyler pulled away from Josh and slid off his lap, so he could look at Mark without breaking his neck.

Josh glanced at Tyler, acting all casual and surprised. "Oh, yeah, we're dating," he said, shrugging. "Sorry we didn't tell you."

"We were too busy kissing. Because we're dating," Tyler helped.

Mark nodded slowly. "That's great, Tyler. Could you make out in front of me less often though?"

"Oh! Yeah, just got carried away. 'Cause Josh is just such a _cutie pie_ ," Tyler said, tapping Josh on the nose and trying to will him not to laugh.

"Uh... Yeah, sure," he said, looking freaked out by this new development. "You know, I think I remember the guys from Paramore saying something was happening. I'm gonna go check that out."

He walked out the bus, looking confused. Tyler and Josh giggled. "Man, he totally believed us. He looked so freaked out!" Tyler said, and Josh nodded.

"Y'know, just out of curiosity, how far are we gonna take this?" he asked. "I mean, how long are we gonna do this for?"

"I dunno. Until we get bored, I guess," Tyler shrugged. He wondered how their parents would react if he told them, and the fans. It would be interesting to see if they accepted it as easily as Mark.

"Yeah, sure," Josh agreed.

***

After that, they spent a lot of time using pet names to address each other (mainly 'babe' and 'darling', because 'cutie pie' wasn't really something they would believably call each other as anything other than a joke) and making out in front of Mark. Mark was beginning to protest more, whining about how he couldn't be in the room with them for more than five minutes before they started kissing.

In all honesty, it wasn't that different to their normal relationship. Sure, they didn't usually kiss, but they did hold hands and cuddle, sometimes using pet names because they found it funny. Tyler figured it was probably just due to how close they were as friends.

People from other bands now thought they were dating, too, because they had gotten used to kissing each other in front of Mark, and it only made it more convincing if they kissed when he wasn't there, too. Sometime during a party in the Fall Out Boy bus, when Josh was off talking to some other people, Pete had walked up to Tyler, clapped a hand on his shoulder and said, "Dude, well done. You guys sure figured it out quicker than me and Patrick." It took Tyler a minute to realise what he was talking about.

"Oh. How long did it take you two?" he asked, because he hadn't been completely sure until now that they had been dating.

"We started dating sometime when we started making new music. I'm not really sure when- we sorta just kissed a lot before we actually started dating," Pete said, laughing a bit. "How did you guys get together?"

They hadn't been asked that before, probably because most people had thought they were dating before they started pretending, so Tyler shrugged. "Uh, I just kissed Josh, really. I didn't think about it. It worked out, though."

Pete nodded, looking as though he'd been in the same situation with Patrick.

After the party, Tyler updated Josh on their story of how they got together, and Josh nodded. "That's pretty much exactly what really happened."

***

They had been fake dating for a couple of months now. It felt natural, kissing Josh, which had to mean that he must be getting better at acting. They had started kissing even when people weren't around, too, because they needed to make it really convincing.

They were doing an interview and sitting close together, Tyler smiling absently as he watched Josh play with his hair while he answered the question. He finished speaking, and the interviewer nodded, agreeing with whatever he was saying.

"Now, there are lots of rumours that you two are in a relationship with each other going around- can you guys confirm or deny this?" the interviewer asked.

Josh looked at Tyler, and he nodded. "Yeah, Josh is my man. Been together for about two months," he said.

The interviewer smiled. "That's sweet- how did you two get together?" she asked, smiling.

Josh offered the microphone to Tyler, letting him tell the story. "It's actually not very interesting at all. Basically, we were just sitting next to each other then I kissed him." Tyler smiled at Josh and held hand with him.

She laughed. "I think it's adorable, especially with you two holding hands."

"Holding hands with your boyfriend is really... punk rock," he told her.

Josh nodded. "So punk rock, yeah."

They kept a straight face for a few seconds before they giggled.

She laughed a bit, then moved on. It was only a couple more minutes before she thanked them for coming, and they left.

After that, it wasn't until they had made their way from where they had been interviewed back to the tour bus that they realised. _They weren't dating_. Josh's head whipped around to stare at Tyler.

"We told her we were dating," he said.

Tyler hesitated, because they _had_. "We're just really into the role. I mean, you don't even like guys," he said. There was no other reason why they'd do it without thinking.

"Tyler, I'm bisexual," Josh said.

"Oh," Tyler said, because he didn't know what else to say. "I'm gay."

Josh looked like he already knew, but didn't say anything.

The lapse of silence before Tyler spoke up felt tense and uncomfortable in a foreign way.

"You know, this is kinda good. We can pretend to be dating for a little longer, then we can break up and go back to normal, but now people know we're not straight without us having to do a big coming out thing," he said, cautious.

Josh seemed to think about it before he said, "Yeah. I mean, it's not like we'll have to lie for long. Should probably tell our families though, so they don't get offended by finding out from the internet or something."

It was strange, in a way, how well this was working, but Tyler saw no reason to fight it, so he just agreed, and called his mom to tell her. She already knew he was gay, and they couldn't exactly go talk to her in Ohio, so telling her over the phone would be fine.

She sounded excited when he told her, and claimed she had known all along, which was impossible, because they _weren't_  dating, but he let her be proud of herself.

When he returned to the small living room space on their bus, Josh was already sitting down, and Tyler joined him. For some reason, Tyler couldn't help but think that Josh looked super attractive today, so he leaned over to kiss him.

In all honesty, it only occurred to him at that moment that most friends didn't just lean other to kiss each other because they looked hot. People usually did that with their partners. Sure, they were fake boyfriends, and so he had managed to justify all of the needless kissing as making their fake dating more convincing, but _why_ were they fake dating?

Originally, it had been to annoy Mark, by making out in front of him, and acting far too cutesy in that gross way that Mark would complain about, but really? They had stopped trying to piss Mark off only a week or so in, so why were they continuing?

Tyler wished he didn't know, because it obviously showed on his face, and Josh was giving him a funny look now.

"You okay, Ty?" he asked, looking concerned.

"I'm fine. Just... thinking," he muttered. Josh gave him a questioning look, prompting him to continue. "Have you ever thought that maybe we're dating?"

"Yeah, Ty, we've been pretending to date for a couple of months now," he said, slowly, in a way that made him sound worried for Tyler, not condescending.

"I know- that's not what I meant," he sighed, and took a deep breath to prepare himself. "What if we're _really_  dating, but we didn't notice? I kissed you just then, and no one's around to see. _Real_ boyfriends do that, not fake boyfriends."

Josh looked at him for a few seconds, then his eyes went wide. Whilst he was in the same state of confusion and panic as Josh, Tyler couldn't help but be proud that he had figured it out and not Josh. When they told people this story, he would be able to proudly say that, for once, he had worked something out before Josh.

"Tyler, we're actually dating," Josh said.

"Yeah."

"Tyler, we're actually dating and I'm in love with you," he said, and whilst he had already said most of it less than ten seconds ago, the extra six words meant a lot to Tyler.

He blushed slightly, because he'd been thinking about them _dating_ , not being in love. But they were in love, weren't they? Josh was his best friend, one of the most important people in his life- right up there with his mom- and they were also in love.

"I'm in love with you," Tyler said.

They grinned at each other, and Tyler hoped they wouldn't realise anything else new today, because two things was enough, really. He was pretty sure they wouldn't make any other big new discoveries, though, because they were making out, and it was hard to think with Josh's lips against his.


End file.
